Payton's B-day

On Saturday we celebrated Payton's first birthday.

Her very first present was from her moma & daddy: a little disney princess tent.

Lets just say she loves it...

& her daddy, too...

& her papal.

Then at her party, they did the presents first. It took her a short while to figure out that there was stuff inside the bags.

I just think this picture is cute. (her plumber shot)

Elizabeth peaked in on each present first. I caught her in the act.

She liked what i got her. ^v

The birthday cake (cupcake)

Before.

After ^v

Then we can't forget the big sister of little Payton.

Elizabeth was a huge help at the party. And never once did she show any sort of jealousy. I was thrilled that she was actually happy that it was Payton's b-day. What a great sister.

Story

I really don't have much to say, so I decided to post the intro to the book I'm currently working on. It's on it's 5th draft if you count all the times I keep changing it and so forth. But it still is of the same story I post about a little while ago.

So, here's the dream intro to my book 'Frozen Inside'.

Dream

Somewhere between awareness and sleep I felt my body pull from the deep depth I was in.
Slowly the heavy weight left me and my mind was suddenly full. The blackness behind my eyelids faded revealing a dark forest floor.
I was running.
Through the black night, my feet never faltered. I ran as if my life depended on it.
My heart thudded in my chest. Steam vapors passed my lips with every gasp. A burning pain screamed in my side. Cold sweat clung to my aching skin. I didn’t slow.
Nothing told me why I was running. My mind and my conscience were on separate levels. I vaguely wondered if I was in any danger as I pushed on. Nothing seemed out of place in the dark grey trees.
Something snagged my foot. I fell to the cold, snow-covered floor.
The moment shocked me. There was a reflecting moment when I saw my surrounding more clearly then before. I was not in a completely blackened forest, but a forest at night with a crystal clear moon shining above. The snow and fog mirrored the white light.
A strong gush of air blew my long hair away from my face. The air suddenly grew colder. Stinging my face as it passed.
I pulled my throbbing hands up. The pervious years’ leaves were under the thin layer of snow. A few twigs clung to my palms.
I wasn’t hurt, so I got to my feet again. There was no way I could run like before. My breathing was still in its own race. My heart still beat against the inside of my chest. I stumbled forward.
So many different things raced in my head. Feelings and actions were on the top of the scale, but there was nothing to relate why this was happening. There was no understanding to why I was running in a dense woods. I wanted to know.
My mind was only registering what emotions I was feeling right then. It was purely out of love that I dashed across this unknown uninhabited waste land.
A beautiful handsome face fixed in the center of my mind. His face was a bit fuzy but his blue eyes shown like beacons. He was simply more-lovely than anyone I had ever seen before. Of course I would do anything for him.
I controlled my breathing and set off again. If I was doing this for him then I couldn’t linger. I had to hurry. It all boiled down to this.
“It will come to pass,” I heard myself say out loud. “This is the only way.”
I had no clue as to why I said it, but it was right. The encouragement pushed me forward again. Whatever I was doing was right and perfect. It had to be. There seemed to be no choice in the matter but to see it through.
I tripped again.
A stinging sensation howled from my hands. Worst than last time. Red blood flowed from my palms.
One of my bleeding hands jumped to my throat, clasping something. I felt my determination strengthened as the cold stone pressed on the scraps.
I jumped to my feet again walking in a hurried pace.
I crested on the top of a hill and paused. This felt very familiar. It was like another time and day came flooding back to my memories. This place was not strange but known. I’ve been here before.
“It would not be any further now,” my voice said.
My words and thoughts confirmed in agreement. I went numb as my feet took off again.
I ran again. I ran against time. For time I knew was growing short with the advancing moon. I raced to an end that I did not know.
Can I really follow through with this? Am I strong enough to defeat the battle before me? Is this really protecting the others? Would he still really love me?
The thoughts confused me. They begged to slow my step as I ran.
That beautiful face came apparent again in my thoughts.
Something reached up taking hold of my foot. I fell forward for the third time. My hands threw out in front of me to brace for the impact. I felt my knees hit the ground hard. The dark winter soil met my already bloody hands. My eyes flew open. The breath of my lungs escaped through my lips.
The world seemed to stand still again.
A drifting cloud of fog flew away from me like ripples on a pond.
Something glinted on the edge of my eyesight.
On the ground, frozen in time was a small puddle. The bleak glint of the moon reflected the trees on to the ice. My eyes locked with my own sunken icy blue eyes. I looked to myself sickly and pale. Despair written clearly in my expression.
“I have to do this.” My voice sounded distance, unsure. I almost wanted to beg for a chance to leave. Some unknowing doom had to be in my immediate future.
No I can’t. I gave in. All my fears and worries came pouring out of me. I knew I was going to die alone. I was too far down this course and my end was near. Death just on the edge of the trees.
I stared at my haunted face in the mirrored ice. The frozen feeling went completely through me. I couldn’t move.
Coming visibly clear on the ice, a face smiled in front of me from behind.
I shook my head at the dream. No, it wasn’t a dream. It’s too real.


There you go. Just a small piece.

Doggie Update

I still don't have my pictures loaded to the computer, so still no Gatlinburg pics.

Flash is going in today at noon for another check up and new bandage. Today should be a good day for him. He's getting the cast off. They are going to do an x-ray to see how well the bone is healing, but they said the wound is completely closed now and the bone should be strong enough for him to stand on. We still don't know of his muscle if he'll ever be able to use it or not, but he's been using his shoulder a lot to work his leg. Now, his leg should just be wrapped to keep it healing striaght. Though he's a disabled dog, it's not slowed him down yet. He still tries to chase deer and geese which is funny with the ecollar around his neck. He uses the casted leg to kick the little puppies away from him and he'll use it to get our attention by hitting us with it. He's a goofy dog that has overcome his difficulties.

Brake Check

Well, at least someone did that to the car in front of me last night.

The SVU guy claimed he was annoyed that the car in front of me wasn't giving him enough room to merge over on the hwy in front of the movies in Corydon. (He didn't use his signals or anything either). So, when he got in front of her, he slammed on his brakes. The car in front of me stopped in time. I didn't. I hit her and the van behind me, hit me. The semi behind the van was paying enough attention and swurved off of the road just in time not to hit all three of us. Thankfully there was no damage, except for the dent I gave the woman car on her licences plate. The SUV guy drove off, leaving us all behind. We all called it a truce since there was nothing to worry about. It took me an hour to calm down enough to drive from my mom's daycare to home. Even though there was no damage, I'm sore and stiff at all my joints. And tired. Very tired.

Gatlinburg:

Was as good as ever. It was very enouraging being with the girls that weekend. I don't think I've fully recovered yet. I just got the pictures on Sunday (I took very little so I'd been waiting on the others hoping they are better then mine.), but I hadn't loaded them to my computer yet. I'll post more on it later with pictures.
I skipped out on the 8 mile hill trail they did on Sunday. I was all for it on Saturday, until it was mentioned about the bridges with only one rail each. Then, I was scrambling mentally thinking how to get out of it without disappointing the others. If anyone knows my roller coaster/heights story than you'd understand perfectly.
Saturday: we took a small trail and got side track at looking at this lovely stream. I got a few pictures of the five foot or so edge that separated the elevated trail and the stream. Just how the sun was shining through and the moss blanketing the ground and trees was pretty to me. Instead of being smart, I followed the girls across stepping stones to the little island in the middle. They were getting pictures of rapids. I was going to try being sneaky and get back to the other side and try get some pictures with them admiring the rapids. It didn't work. I fell in. I had my cell phone & camera. The camera works. My phone doesn't. Sadly, the phone that took my abuse got replaced on tuesday. My pass phones didn't last as long as this one had or with stood the amount of torture I gave it. This new one almost screams at me saying it's breakable. I've already dropped it once this morning. It seems fine.

But back to the fall, the girls were real sweet about it. They were understanding and helped by taking my phone & camera and setting them out to dry. At first I thought i was fine, but then we went shopping and slowly my knee hurt. For that whole evening, I seriously wondered if I broke my knee cap. It was black and swollen. But I don't have insurance and I wasn't about to let them know. Now, it doesn't matter because my knee is fine and the bruise is almost gone.

Sunday: we went to this little congregation. I want so badly to help them out. The two years we've now been there they seem to be struggling in more then one way. I didn't get to speak to any of them this year, but they don't seem that strong of Christains. They're trying, but with the conditions they are struggling with (financially & government restrited meeting times because of their bad water) they just don't seem strong. The class I got lost in. We read a passage, then he jumped back and reviewed heavily of the prior passage. It was encouraging to find out they had only started three years ago and they've maintain ties since then. It just makes me feel helpless. I want to do more for them, because they are God's people and ARE trying to follow Him and spread the word. I'm just worried.

The evening: I stayed at the cabin while they went hiking. I worked on my book for the most part. I work best with an open window. So I turned off the heat and opened the door. The ceiling fan didn't work. I played with it, but I think the motor is burned up. But I typed seven pages (which is a lot for me in one run). I thought I saved it; but the computer had mircosoft processer and I was using regular word and had to keep going back and forth on the saving files. (Monday morning I discovered it didn't save. I only got caught back up this pass weekend.) That night the girls bought pizza and we watched TV. It was fun in the sense it was relaxing.

Monday we went to a pancake house and afterwards shopped some more. Then we had our last study out side in the sunshine and headed back home.

Hopefully I'll be able to post some pictures. It really is a pretty place there and it just makes me wish to go hiking more often at home. I know our hills don't equal theirs but our history in the forestry is just as rich.

Friday

To start off, Flash is doing better. The cast hasn't slowed him down at all. He's getting his fifth cast today. They have to keep changing it out because they physically couldn't close the wound with stitches, so to be as non detailed as possible, the hole is left open and healing. It's healing quicker then what the vet was expecting. I'm going to try talking one on one with what his actually process is. His bills are kinda up there and my budget is tight, now even tighter. Looks like school is getting put off again till the fall. I was going to go this summer, but the vet bills are higher then what my car is value at. Sorry, to be complaining. I just got the Gatlinburg trip this weekend and all on top of it. I've been trying my hardest to look forward to the trip, but with leaving so much going on at home, I'm worried. I'm probably going to be calling home every few minutes checking on things.
Monday, unfortunately, is my 24th birthday. Normally, I get to hide in a hole. Last year, I was in Gatlinburg, which wasn't to bad. We went to Cades Cove which was fun. I'm one of those historial weirdo's so that was a treat. Then they took me out to dinner. I've never been one to like my birthday. I only did the kiddy parties, because my mom loves them. Me, my sister, & my brother take after my dad more. We don't like aging. My mom loves parties, but when the attention is focused on her, she fits in with us on the no attention level. But she'll be 50 this year. (Evil grin).

On a different note: My books are coming along very slowly. I'm at the point of the Book 2 where I'm having to do research to make it as real and believable as possible. I'm only on chapter 10 of that book. This one might be longer then the first. Which is scary. Book 1: I'm still working on draft 3. Almost done with it though. Just three more chapters and draft 3 will be done and draft 4 can start. Draft 4 is where I'm changing it from 3rd person to 1st. I'm looking forward to that, oddly enough. I think after draft 4, I'm going to see if someone outside my fan base (aka: a good friend & coworker) would read it and give an opinion. But we'll see.

I got just under 7 hours before I leave for Tennessee. And a little over 3 hours before I leave from work. :)

Flash update

Nope, not the coon. He's been shot. The bone in his shoulder is completely shatter. He has no feeling in his leg. From the size of the wound and destruction, he will never be able to walk on it again. The vet can't even stitch him up. He's at the vet for the next two days and going through surgery.

Tuesday

I woke up this morning very early. There was no sunlight in the sky. I looked over at my clock to see it was almost four thirty. I rolled over and drifted between wakefullness and sleep. I finally lifted my head again to see it was after six thirty. Late. I hurriedly fled my room, showered, changed, made sure Gary was awake and gathered my things. I had one job left to do. Feed the animals. I went outside, still hurrying, pourd out dog food, and cat food in their respective places. Then I noticed my dog, Flash. He rolled over like always wanting a morning belly rub. His tail was wagging. It was still dark outside. I reached over to pet him, when I felt something warm and soft. With the light of my cell phone, I was grossed out. Flash has been hurt again. Again, and again and again. This poor dog can't stay out of trouble. He's been attacked by what I assume is a coon.
I thought I was going to be late this morning, I was now. I brought him in and taped up the gapping hole in his leg the best I could. I knew from his lack of movement and such that he was in a lot of pain. It looked like it would be to. As much gore as I've seen living on a farm, you'd think I could handle this. As I taped him close, I got light headed and queasy. I called mom and she said to see if Steve (my neighbor & sister's father-in-law) could take him. Luckily Steve was awake and agreed to take him. The worst part was having to leave the poor guy.
I sit here at work, just finishing the flood of orders from our main buyer, and my phone rang. It was mom. The first thing out of her mouth was the enormous price the vet is charging. It's only a few hundred shy of what the 3 nights stay & lung surgery and such was in Louisville. Mom told me that she told them to go ahead with it. Flash somehow managed to get metal chips in the wound. We can only guess that while he was fighting the coon, he must've hit something down in the barn - like the round bailer or a sheet of tin or something like that. He has to be in a splint and they are going to do x-rays to see if he has any broken bones. With the muscle torn like it is, there maybe a chance he'll never be able to walk on that leg again. He just turned a year old in Feb. My mom suggested that my brother needs to go coon hunting. Even more so now, that dad moved Daisy May and her six snow white beagle pups down there.
Life is never daul on the farm.